“For there are many who are… empty talkers and deceivers” (Titus 1:10, ESV).
Remember when you were a student assigned to write a paper that had to be a certain number of words? I’m sure you never did what I sometimes did: add fluff to your paper to meet the word count and write 500 words while not saying much. I recall one paper in seminary. The syllabus said 10,000 - 12,000 words, but the professor said, “I’d rather have 6,000 words that make a point than 12,000 empty words.”
There are a lot of people who are empty talkers. I meet them frequently in my vocation. They breeze into the church and make a big display of raising their hands and singing passionately in worship. They nod throughout the sermon and may even be bold enough to say, “Amen!” a time or two. They come up to me after the service and introduce themselves, telling me of the many times the Lord has spoken to them just in the past 24 hours. They can quote Bible verses and quip Christian cliches, and their speech is peppered with Christianese and fancy $2 words of the theological variety.
Occasionally, one of these people will still be part of the church six months later. The vast majority last two or maybe three weeks. And then I never see them again.
It’s too easy to put on a plastic Christian facade on a Sunday morning and pretend to be something you’re not. We’re struggling with a loss of joy, but we smile and say, “I’m great!” when people ask how we’re doing. We’re worried about a situation at work, but we don’t mention it when someone asks, “How can I pray for you?” We’re dealing with chronic pain, but we don’t share the toll it’s taking on us, causing us to question if God really cares. On the flip side, we ask someone in the lobby, “How are you doing?” but we hope they say, “Fine,” so we don’t have to get bogged down listening to their problems. Instead of being vulnerable, we fill the conversational space with empty words, pretending things are better than they are.
Empty words won’t help. You don’t have to pretend. The truth is, others are hurting, too. Others are struggling with depression, too. Others had a moral failure this weekend, too. Others are angry with their kids or their spouse, too. Others are wondering whether God sees them and if this whole Christianity thing is really making a difference, too. And others would be encouraged to hear they’re not alone in feeling this way, too.
So, let’s not be empty talkers and deceivers. This week, reach out to a friend and meet for coffee. How are you doing—really? What’s God stirring in you lately? How can we pray for one another? Be honest. It’s amazing how encouraging it is to talk about something real with a friend who loves you.
As always your blog inspires me to take an honest look at myself. I usually don't really like my answers to my own questions.
While my intention is to be at church every Sunday that I can be, and I can only I wish I could talk about how many times God has talked to me, I am the one that when asked how I'm doing, my answer is generally "I'm doing good". I have even at Gospel Community had someone that I respect a great deal as a strong Christian offer a prayer for me and I actually said "that's ok I'm doing good now". Something I'm very much disappointed in myself for.
In my journey to learn how to live as a Christian should I've had to face a lot of truths about myself. Your blog has been a key part of my journey.