The Benefits of Being Quiet

A reflection on Proverbs 17:28

Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent. —Proverbs 17:28 (ESV)

Photo by Brett Jordan on Unsplash

Mark Twain and Abraham Lincoln are both often quoted as saying, “Better to keep quiet and be thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.” Although we don’t know who actually coined the phrase, we can see its wisdom. How many times have you spoken out of turn or put your foot in your mouth because you were too quick to speak? If you’re anything like me, it’s more than you care to admit.

We live in a world of information gluttony. The superfluity of data coming at us all the time quickly overloads our brains' circuits and leads to all kinds of problems. As Dr. Iaian Provan said in his excellent commentary on Ecclesiastes, “We live in a world in which, ‘Have you heard the latest,’ is a more pressing question than, ‘Do you know the truth.’” In this moment where everyone is rushing to be the first to tell the story, upload the video, retweet the post, or share their perspective, there’s a real temptation to speak (or text or tweet) before we think.

And when we do that, we remove all doubt and confirm that, yes, we are indeed fools.

As a Lead Pastor, I talk for a living. People ask for my perspective on theological topics, social issues, and news stories. In meetings with staff or church leaders, my voice often carries significant weight because of my position. I have learned (okay, I’m still learning) to make myself be quiet and listen to what others have to say. When I wait to speak, others feel more confident to share their thoughts. And they often have great things to share! If I wade in with my opinions right away, I’ll never get to hear some of that wisdom from the quieter voices in the room.

According to Proverbs 17:28, even a fool will be thought wise if he holds his tongue. May God give us the wisdom to button our lips, listen to others with genuine interest, and think before we open our mouths to reveal that we don’t really know as much as we think we do! As you head to Thanksgiving gatherings this week, make it a goal to listen more than you talk. Sometimes, the best gift you can give a family member or friend is a listening ear.